My Best Friend

I've been thinking about my best friend tonight, and I couldn't help sitting down and writing a bit about him and what a best friend is. He and I became best friends before we fell in love, and we have been best friends ever since.

- A best friend is someone you can talk to about anything: There is nothing in this world that I can't talk to this man about. He listens, he is understanding, and he doesn't judge. I feel completely safe to tell him anything about me and I know he will love me unconditionally.

- A best friend is someone you love spending time with: I love hanging out with him more than anyone else in this world. He is adventurous and fun, yet he enjoys and evening watching a movie on the couch as well. No matter what we are doing, I am completely satisfed because he is so great to be around.

- A best friend is someone that makes you laugh: He has a great sense of humor. He makes me laugh every single day, even on the tough days.

- A best friend is always there for you: He has helped me through some of the most difficult times of my life. He has held me when I am crying. He has helped me solve problems that I don't know how to solve. He is always available when I need him, even if it is the middle of the night.

- A best friend is not afraid to correct you when you are wrong: He helps me find better ways to do and handle things, and does it in a way that is loving and kind. His intent is always genuine and sincere.

- A best friend helps you be more confident: He never fails to tell me how beautiful I look, or how proud he is of me and the thing I am donig.

- A best friend makes you feel loved always: Not a day goes by that my best friend doesn't tell me and show me how much he loves me. He makes me feel that I matter more to him than anything.

I am sure there are more characteristics that make up a best friend, but these are just a few that come to my mind when I think of my best friend. I sincerely hope and pray that everyone in this life will have the blessing of a best friend. I don't know what I would do without mine.

Question Girl

When I was a little girl, I had the nickname "Question Girl." There was even a song that went something like "She's question girl, question girl, QUESTION girl." And so, you can imagine when that song was sung to me I was asking questions... many of them. Most of my questions seemed to start with the word, "Why." "Why does it work that way," was especially popular.

I have always been very interested in why things are they way they, how they work, and why they work that way. I remember a specific story that will illustrate my curious self well. When I was about elementary school age, I got really frustrated with pi, and by that I mean 3.14.. The number you multiply by the circumference, radius, etc. I so curiously asked my mom, "Why is it 3.14 and how did they get that number?" She replied, "It is just the number that a very smart mathematician came up with in a way that it probably too difficult for you to understand. You just have to trust that it works and plug it into your equation." I answered, "But it just bugs me to use a formula that I don't even know how they got? It's like I'm just plugging numbers in, not knowing what I actually am doing?" My patient mom replied, "But you just have to. Someday you can learn how they got pi, but at this point in time you don't have to worry about it and you just have to use it." And so, I grudgingly would, though it irritated me. Similar conversations were had throughout my years of math, and my mom would always respond patiently, I might add, the same.

The desire to know the HOW and WHY benefitted me greatly in my education, especially in nursing school and in my prerequisites leading up to nursing school. I never wanted to just memorize structures in the body. I wanted to know HOW they worked and WHY they did what they did. I wanted to know HOW the retrovirus HIV causes so much destruction, despite fact that it isn't even considered a living thing. I wanted to know WHY metoprolol (a medication) lowers blood pressure, all the way down to the minutely small receptors that it binds to. I didn't just want memorize that metoprolol is prescribed for high blood pressure.

As you can see... This HOW and WHY desire has benefitted me throughout my life and education. However, our greatest strengths are often our greatest weaknesses. It does not come without it's downsides, and that's because we can't always know the how and the why. My young brain was too small to comprehend how pi was determined. I'm also now unable to comprehend some of the complexities of life, and it can be really hard on me at times.

I don't know why some prayers aren't answered the way I think they should be. I don't know why some people are given trials that seem too difficult for anyone to have to bear. I don't understand how God can hear the prayers of billions of people at a time, or how Christ took upon Him the sins of the world. I wish there was a textbook that explained it all. Of course we have the scriptures and the prophets who have helped us understand more about these things, but no where can I read the molecular structure of how God can her billions of prayers at once.

Sometimes I find this really frustrating. However, I have found that I have to set my analytical mind aside and TRUST... as I once had to do with pi. I have to have faith that God hears and answers every prayer, because I know He has answered mine. I just have to let go and believe, because the feelings I have in my heart tell me that these things are true. I don't have to know why they are. I just have to know they are.

Clarification...

About my last post, I hate to say it, but I think I have to take back #3. I worked out like crazy yesterday and almost every muscle in my body today aches and burns. My calves, quads, hamstrings, inner thighs, butt, back, abs, obliques, pecs, deltoids, and lats are so incredibly sore that when I move I feel like I am physically abusing myself. After my work-out session, #1 remained true, my heart loved it. #2 remained true, my bones loved it. #4 remained true, my brain loved it. And #5 remained true, my metabolism loved it. However, #3 turned out to be a lie. My muscles hate me right now, and they are letting me know it every time a move, and even when I don't. In a couple days, my muscles will be glad, but right now, they are mad.

You may be wondering why I did this to myself. Especially after my last post about wanting to treat my body right. Well... I didn't mean to. That's the problem. Sometimes I think I am still a gymnast and can not only do the skills I once did, but the exercises as well. And again, that's part of the problem, because many of those things I still can do. My body just punishes me in a way that it never used to.

Another problem here? My competitive nature. My last name may be Rees... but I still have "Smith blood" and with that comes a ridiculous amount of desire to win, and when I saw a fitness competition started at www.trickcomp.com, I just couldn't help myself. And of course, I had to try more than once, which never should have happened.

But it did, and my muscles will heal :)

Why Do I Exercise?

Why Do I Exercise?

1. My heart loves it. With every pounding thump in my chest, my heart is getting stronger and telling me "thank you."
2. My bones love it. I am a thin, petite woman... a walking, breathing, osteoporosis risk. But every time I get out there and run, my bones are telling me "thank you."
3. My muscles love it. With every burning step and every burning crunch, they are getting stronger and stronger. I can feel my muscles telling me,"thank you."
4. My brain loves it. I get an increase in endorphins that cause my mind to relax. I can see everything more clearly and my tension is released. I can hear my brain telling me, "thank you."
5. My metabolism loves it. Thyroxine is released and all of my cells get to work, fueling on my body's glucose, and my energy levels are increased. Once again, my metabolism is telling me, "thank you."

I exercise because it makes me the strong woman I envision myself to be. I do it because it gives me confidence. I do it because it is who I have always been, and who I will always be.

The Languages of Love

So as I was writing my last post, it kind of struck me that I cared so much that Casey had written a schedule for our date. Why was that one of my favorite parts of the date? And then it hit me. My language of love is quality time, and when I saw that Casey had planned out a whole evening of quality time, I felt so loved.

I'm sure many have heard of the book, "The 5 Languages of Love" by Gary Chapman. I wish I could say I've actually read it, but I've known about it for a long time and about the 5 languages of love he suggests. I just love this concept and I completely believe it is true. Chapman believes that we all feel love in different ways, and knowing this about our loved ones can help us love them in the way they need to be loved. Of course we all feel love in all five of the different ways, but he believes that each of us has one way that speaks volumes above the rest.

I think it is so fun to figure out what someone's language is and to love them that way!

These are posted directly from the website:

Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.

Quality Time
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.

Receiving Gifts
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.

Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.

Physical Touch
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive

RN Celebration Date

Casey took me on an incredibly fun RN celebration date last night. We started off downtown at Settebello's for some amazing authentic Italian pizza. So yummy, definitely recommend it. We then walked down to Tony Caputo's which is an Italian market and Casey let me pick out two fancy chocolate bars (my favorite). So of course the moment we walked out of the market, I had to taste one of my chocolates... and a few seconds into it my mouth started burning. I had accidently gotten a "chili chocolate." Sick. I did have my other one and I was satisfied with that, but Casey insisted we go get another one to make up for the gross one. So I am set up with chocolate for the next couple weeks (more like days.. haha). After the chocolate, I got a phone call with an amazing piece of news, I was called off of work for that night's grave shift! My mood was already incredibility elevated, so you can imagine how sky high it was at this pointl We then walked to the Gateway and got Ben and Jerry's and watched the fountains while we ate it. Once again, yum. After that, we rushed up to the mountain to go on a hike to a destination that overlooks the valley and Casey had blankets and pillows and we watched the sunset until it was dark. It was gorgeous! We then watched a couple episodes of The Office on his laptop, packed up the blankets, and hiked down in the dark. I definitely lost my balance and slid down this whole dirt hill.Not awesome.. haha. After we got down the mountain we went grocery shopping, went home and ate some peaches, and then went to bed.
One of my most favorite parts of the night was the "schedule" Casey had in his wallet that he frequently looked at, and that I, of course, was forbidden to look at. I love love love when he plans things like this. He always thinks them out and plans such fun nights together. This brings me to my "language of love," which is "quality time" and is what my next post is going to be about. :)

Real Grown-Up

So I've had this blog for a little while now, but I've always just kept it private and used it as a journal.. Sort of.. I've only posted on it like 5 times... But I thought I'd be wild and crazy and let anyone who wants to read it... Read it. So.. Here goes!

In the last couple of months I feel like I've gone from "pretend grown-up" to real "grown up." Yeah, I've been married, we have our own condo, cars, bills, etc... But I've always still been in school and just working part time. We've been kidless, and have still sort of felt like kids ourselves. However... In the last few months my life has changed dramatically! I officially finished school. Done. No more papeers, no more tests, no more late nght study sessions. Two days ago I became a registreed nurse, which is what I've wanted to be when "I grow up" for about 12 years now. I have begun working full time And actually making a financial contribution to the family. I had the blessing and opportunity to be pregnant for 11 short weeks, until sadly we lost the baby, but I have felt different ever since that time. Like I was a "mom" for a moment in time, beginning to make the sacrifices and beginning to love like a mom does. And to top all this "adult" stuff off, I had a real interview today, for a real "adult" job.

Now don't get me wrong, I am still in my 20's, still young, and still love being young, but the transition in the last few months has been life altering, and I am loving it! I always told Casey when I was in school that I was sick of school and that, "I want to be a real person!" So.. I guess you could say I'm a real person now, and I am loving it.

Sundays

Such a nice sunday today. Went to church and taught my 10/11 year old primary kids a lesson on prayer. I really enjoy teaching the older girls because I really get something out of the lesson and it is fun being able to really interact with them. Then we got home and made burritos yet again! That is our thing lately. Then we watched an episode of The Office and America's Home Videos and I started to fall asleep so I went in and took a very needed nap. Casey woke me up a bit later and we just hung out together. I love spending time with him. There is nothing I love more! We then went and visited his family for just a bit. We had to go to the store to pick up some items to help with my GI issues (ugh). Casey then made us hawaiian haystacks and we watched Survivor while we ate. After we sat down in the living room and watched a couple things on the internet, and then looked at pictures of us from the last couple years.

Have I mentioned how much I love hanging out with this man? Sundays at home are some of my very favorite.

Also... I think I might be pregnant! I have said this a million times before, but there is a real chance I could be this time. I just feel different than usual. I can't believe how much I hope that I am! I can't wait to be a mom. I can't wait to see Casey be a dad. He will be incredible. I can't wait to add to our family! So, if we aren't pregnant this time around, then we are going to officially be trying!! So happy. :)

Lately

Life has continued on, like it always does since my last post. Writing in any form of a journal has never been an easy thing for me. But, as usual, I'll keep trying.

Life since last July? Still incredibly in love with my man. We sold the Ice Shanty and are discontinuing Element 7. They were time takers, not especially money makers. That Shanty supported us through the whole summer though. What a blessing. Element 7 was also a great experience.

Now? I am still in nursing school, but the time is ticking! I have less than 5 months left until I am an RN, and this last Monday I passed my LPN boards. I thinking nursing school has probably caused the most stress and the hardest work I've ever experienced in my life. Lucky thing is, I still love it. I still love nursing. I am terrified to be a nurse, yet excited at the same time. I want to be an amazing nurse. I truly do. I'm hoping that I'll be able to work at Primary Children's. That is my big goal.

One of the funnest things about nursing school is my friends. Thank goodness there is something fun to look forward to on those long lecture days and study sessions.

Casey is a stud. He is working for Groove right now selling Dish and Direct TV, and has been doing that door to door since the end of the summer. He does a great job supporting us. He recently just got offered a position in commercial sales at the same company! It satisfies his desire for a flexible schedule, base pay, and commission. For a while he was considering Deals That Matter, as well as a position in Michigan. Michigan is still a maybe in the future, but isn't looking like a huge possibility right now.

Who knows?

:)

Expectations

Expectations.

Expectations don't always become reality. In fact, they often don't.

The cool thing is, when they don't, often there is something even cooler around the corner. And when they do, well great, you got what you wanted!

I EXPECTED to go to the University of Utah Nursing Program. I am absolutely happy at DATC with incredible friends and a program that I love.

I EXPECTED to have my dad around for my whole life. Instead... I met the man of my dreams that the thing that brought us together was something we both shared... a struggling parent who didn't conquer their temptations.

I EXPECTED to have my home decorated by now. I love what our home is to Casey and I. The memories that we have created with the amazing marriage that we have is cooler than a painted kitchen, and a bookshelf with stuff on it. It's what we've worked on and are working towards.

I EXPECTED as a kid to go to college with gymnastics. I'm so glad it didn't. I had a great childhood, and who knows where I would be.... would I have found Casey?

Those are just a few...

I have a few more "Expectations" that seem to be lingering.

I am expecting to lose the weight I want to lose...

I am expecting to do well for the rest of the summer with the shack...

I am expecting to get a scholarship or a grant for the last bit of school...

I am expecting to get pregnant when we decide to start trying...

I am expecting that Element & will continue forward despite issues regarding Sub Zero...

I am expecting to be in a home in the next few years...

I am expecting all my loved ones to be there all the time.

Sounds stuck up to say I am expecting all of those things... but I am. Aren't you expecting the same (though possibility variations) things in your life?

The things is, we all have expectations every day. I expect that I am going to wake up tomorrow morning, and that my husband is going to wake up next to me. I also expect I'll get up on time.

The question is... what expectations are going to become realities? It can give my heart a little jump to think about the lingering expectations listed above NOT occurring...

What would I have said if someone told me 10 years ago that "you aren't going to get into the University of Utah nursing program. You're dad will die when you are 15. Oh, and you won't be a gymnast in college or have a decorate home for 2 years after your marriage." Probably would have hurt my heart. However... I like my life better now, than if I had gotten those things that I thought I wanted, or expected.

That's the thing. Those expectations didn't become a reality... but I'm still happy. The one expectation we can always count on if we so choose to.

Life comes at us everyday. Sometimes our expectations become reality, and sometimes they don't. Our expectation of happiness, however, can always be a reality.... and if we choose to let it be, we will find happiness in the alternative pathways, and alternative expectations. We don't have to wait and see. We can choose that everyday, despite the possible expectations that haven't become reality... or the ones that have. Doesn't matter.

Happiness is an expectation I choose to have.

Life...

I love life. More specifically, MY life. I wake up to Casey every morning. Our mornings usually consist of getting ready, me working out, him getting stuff done in his office, meeting together for breakfast and scriptures, and then heading out to our day. We both work super hard, whatever it is we're doing... and then if we are lucky enough to both be able to be home at a decent hour, I cook a nice dinner and we usually watch the Office or Lost. Then, he holds me EVERY night as we fall asleep.

Sounds like an ordinary day? Well sometimes, our ordinary days are what makes me LOVE my life. MY ordinary day, consists of being married to the man of my dreams, and spending several hours with him a day. It consists of me having a strong, able body that can work out every day. It involves the gospel, and trying to live the principles of it. Right now (it's summer) it always involves some sort of sun soaking. It consists of our fun condo that we have worked on together, and that is still not done enough to be decorated. It consists of dirty dishes sometimes, because we chose to cuddle on the couch instead. It always involves family in some way or another, which are, of course, the most important people in my life. It consists of hard work, which always brings happiness into our home. It always consists of my husband holding me, and kissing me so sweetly.

Ordinary?

Not a chance.

Lately

Element 7 Creamy KILLED it at the Arts Festival this last weekend. Casey and I have never worked so hard in our life! We basically worked from Wednesday to Sunday from 6 a.m. to 1 a.m. every day! It went so well though. It was so much fun to see everything come together. We had on average 4 employees working with us a day. We had a tent set up behind the table for mixers, pumpers, and stockers. Then on the trailer we would have 4 people doing orders, flavors, mixing, and nitrogen. It was nuts. At one point, we were pumping out 80 ice creams an hour! That's a freaking lot! Over the whole weekend we sold over 2000 ice creams. So, to say the least, it was a success! We learned a lot. We also had the chance to do a press review on Wednesday night, as well as a news spot on Channel 2 news on Friday morning! We had to be to our booth super early on Friday, and we got a two and a half minute slot. I showed the process of pumping the cream and the flavors, and Casey showed the nitrogen part. It was sweet!

Our next event is this weekend for the Fourth of July at the Sandy Fireworks. Only one day... it'll be a piece of cake :).

We've spoiled ourselves a little bit this week after so much hard work last week. We went swimming on Monday, took my mom to a movie (Toy Story 3) and dinner (The Cheesecake Factory) on tuesday as a thank you for her help at the Arts Festival, we went to the new Twilight: Eclipse today with Hannah, and we went kayaking today at the Daybreak Lake. SO much fun. This was our first time kayaking with our new (from last summer!) kayaks. Neither of us tipped! It was really fun.

Fun week... but back to hard work! :)

Blogging?

I've finally done it... I've started a blog. I promised I never would, but I decided it would be a good way for me to keep a "journal" of our lives, since I can't seem to do that in a book. It looks pretty bad, so I'll have to see if I can figure that part of it out.

Casey and I have been married for two years. We have an incredible marriage! Everyone always says that the first year of marriage is the hardest. If that was the hardest, then I guess our life is going to be pretty dang good!

We have done so many thing in our first years of marriage, including: honeymoon to hawaii, living in Bountiful, buying a condo in Holladay, trip to Jackson hole, snowboarding, camping, working on our condo, Casey working at Paramed, Me coaching level 6, Valentines at the Grand America, winning state meet, getting into nursing school, buying and running the Ice Shanty, going to the Uintah's for our first anniversary, hiking, mountain biking, Lake Powel, Lake Powel again, Casey quitting Paramed and starting Impact, Christmas's and Holidays, Beacon Christmas lights, a trip to Michigan, me starting nursing school, Starting Element 7 Creamery, 4.0 first nursing semester, business credit cards, Moab, and Moab again.

Those are just a few of the highlights.

The main highlight, however, is the amazing man that I am lucky to call my husband. I can't imagine a better man to share my life with. He works harder than anyone I know. He is incredibly handsome with a smile that melts me, and he makes me laugh everyday. He has an incredible enthusiasm for life that radiates to everyone around him. He continually does sweet things for me and is always selfless. He is the man of my dreams, and I don't know how I managed to get him to marry me.

What more is there?